My Horizontal Life

My Horizontal Life Summary

In this raucous collection of true-life stories, Chelsea Handler recounts her time spent in the social trenches with that wild, strange, irresistible, and often gratifying beast: the one-night stand.

You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itself and as common as a bar stool.

Enter Chelsea Handler. Gorgeous, sharp, and anything but shy, Chelsea loves men and lots of them. My Horizontal Life chronicles her romp through the different bedrooms of a variety of suitors, a no-holds-barred account of what can happen between a man and a sometimes very intoxicated, outgoing woman during one night of passion. From her short fling with a Vegas stripper to her even shorter dalliance with a well-endowed little person, from her uncomfortable tryst with a cruise ship performer to her misguided rebound with a man who likes to play leather dress-up, Chelsea recalls the highs and lows of her one-night stands with hilarious honesty.

Encouraged by her motley collection of friends (aka: her partners in crime) but challenged by her family members (who at times find themselves a surprise part of the encounter), Chelsea hits bottom and bounces back, unafraid to share the gritty details. My Horizontal Life is one guilty pleasure you won't be ashamed to talk about in the morning.

Book Reviews


She was always a bit sideways haha5 star

I love anything from her whether it be her old TV show, her Netflix tour lol or many funny books Fav comedian female by far, great book!!55


Hilarious!5 star

One of my 3 favorite Chelsea books of all time. When I have a long day, reading her books makes me forget my life and transports me into hers with her hilarious (and true) stories.55


Funny stories, well written5 star

If you are a fan of Chelsea Handlers like I am, this is a great and funny book to read. Chelsea is a great storyteller and not one of the stories disappoint. The stories are well detailed, fairly graphic, and are short and to the point.55


No class.1 star

Do we really live in an age where grown women live and act like this? How about all the people who have had one night stands and regretted it ? This book is glorifying an act that is meant to be between a woman and a man in a committed relationship. Sleeping around gets you NOWHERE. No one ever looks back on their life and says ,"gee, wish I would have had more awkward sex with strangers". Bravo to Chelsea handler for being a wonderful example to young women on how to act like trash and be used by men.15


My Horizontal Life5 star

Well written,hilarious,addictive until finish and For was the first one Humor book I read,laughing a lot of the events occurred. She's brilliant, And refreshing. Highly recommended 😂😂😅😀😃😄😍🤗🤗🤑🤑55

Nickname mo

Cure for any bad day5 star

Just finished reading this for the 2nd time. Honest. Hilarious and very well written. I can't even count how many times I couldn't stop laughing while reading this.55

Ct what it be...

Loved every lol second of it5 star

I couldn't help but laugh out loud on my train ride to work. Great start to my day every morning. I read it slowly so I was able to enjoy the laughs a little longer :)55


Funny4 star

Good read! Loved it45


Hilarious!!5 star

The book was so funny I couldn't put it down!55

   Users Online